Ugh

I feel like throwing up.

Apology

I was trying to talk in general, tonight, but it seemed a bit iffy altogether.

Oh, no!

My heart!

I'm a real person.

You may think you can organize things in a way that works out, but you don't pay the ultimate sacrifice.

Who are any of you

to take on the position of just telling me when I've said something that's not just fluff?  Saying I should regret things but you .. don't.

See, I'm not being sarcastic nor shouting nor pointing fingers.  This does happen.

Fluff

All this what I think and put on my blog mattering is a violation.

WHAT

WHY DO YALL KEEP ACTING LIKE I'M BAD THEN SAYING YOU DON'T

Special Postal Services

Why is my dad being offered special postal service in the form of singing telegrams

saying I don't deserve what others do?  I mean getting so violent towards me.  Like teasing me and judging me for sensing my inner thoughts.

You're the lot mostly all criminals seems.  You are trying to treat me hypnotically in bad ways.  You think you are so much better you can teach me a lesson.  You're all the ones who need a lesson.  Admit it.

You know, my dad supposedly doesn't even agree with all this hullabaloo.

Maybe, I need to take an inner stand with myself and I'm blocking it out.  I just wanted to post about it on my blog online.

which

means people who pretend to pay a lotta attention to me, like those kids in school claiming they dubbed me as nice, only in the end to ruin the fairness of my life, like I was a spoiled person in and of myself.

"The Ultimate Sacrifice"

I'm not paying the ultimate sacrifice.

Because some people have nothing better to do than to befriend me only to betray me.

Problems

Dr. Phil is fine in a lotta ways.  My dad said yea that I said he tries to look big, tho.  I like being powerful.  Keep up what is best for you, tho.  However that may be.  My Gramma and aunt used to be cool and big.

You can run, but you can't hide.

Dr. Phil knows what people really want.

I don't believe in thinking about someone else and someone else thinking about me every time we get attention just because mess-ups pretend to do that to to others to only make themselves look good to older adults.

Sad

I sometimes wish people would leave my family alone.

Dontcha Hate It When You Find

I hate it when people lie and say I need to be sheltered.

Confused

You people are just out to get me.

Threatened?

I wonder if people feel threatened if something isn't about someone or if it's for someone else in the world in some remote corner.

Whatever is your own prerogative.  I just noticed that it seems like there's a threat.  A threat is dangerous.  I guess they like what they do, tho.  That's all, just worried.

Why are people of the sentiment that I should just cease to exist?

Just Ate

I have 2 hamburgers steada 1 like Dad and Mom.  I finished 1 1/2.  I had a few packs of fruit and vegetable gummie snacks.  Ketchup is gone.

TV

I saw Josh Groban and Renee Fleming on TV last night!  Good job!  Nice appearance!

Cool and Sporty

Ellen may be cool and sporty, but she's more unforgiving than older women.

Back

from the grocery store

waiting around to get hungry again

I got 2 packs of cookies, coconut and caramel and chocolate, a new kind, buy 1 get 1 free
brownie mix with walnuts, kina what I been looking fer
a pack of cupcakes

I finally got some chips.  I spotted the cheese dressing.  Guess it's like Nachos and cheese.  I like them at Taco Bell.  I ate there every weekend for awhile.

etc.

It's looking like a good diet.

I'll be back.

Might be out late, dunno.  Might come in and post and sleep.  Etc.

Bye!

Just Ate

I smelled all these spices from my mom and 1st had some veggie chips and tea and sparkling water.. then I went for a hot dog and like 5 mostly bigger sized chocolates and a full bowl of ice cream topped with the chocolate syrup.  I think it's hamburgers tonight.  I take an extra, usually.

Interesting

People think I need to give it a rest while they surpass me.

New Video of Me Singing

New Video of Me Talking

Hey Doc

So, I noticed that since I was in trouble people are even discriminating against me racially.  I'm not a bad person.

Hence, it was not supposed to be a total annihilation.

Security

The manager asked me if things were okay when I was complaining and they sent in security at the movies.  The people were like laughing in an annoying way and other annoying noises.  I had spoken with the manager earlier about how little hours you can work there in 1 day.

Ate

2 pieces of bologna
lite cheese stick
salted cashews
big salad - lettuce head, broccoli, carrots, green and black olives, oil

New Picture of Me

Imgur

So

No more rash moves?  Too bad tho I felt I was being pounded my mom driving me.  I know what I talk about is disagreeable, tho, to some.

Up on a Weekend

Dr. Phil?

Morning

Grain Cereal

You know, if you say that you're not punishing me by giving another girl attention over me in some abstract definition, it seems it was rather serious what you did as your said response.

In fact, let's see if it wasn't serious to you.

I'm not being sarcastic.  I'm just stating a fact.

Also, no, there is no explanation for this idea that keeps coming to my head that probably is false.  I mean, the idea was not explained, not that there is no explanation.

If it's the person who decided to do it, or if the person does like listening to someone else, then that's their prerogative.

Nite

All I had was coffee for supper.

Apology

I'm so sorry for the severity of my thoughts.  It got lodged in my head.  Can we lodge it out?  I think it really just popped out and I felt as though I meant it when I know I didn't.  I wonder what the next challenge or punishment will be.

I don't really know

what's going on.  I don't have anything to be embarrassed about.  Get over it?

Apology

for the misunderstanding.  I don't quite know what goes on about me.  For the bad words.

Racists

All these people lie that I wanna be trashy racially.  They are all at me and telling me I do this I do that.  I do this to someone I do that to anyone.

Apology

I'm watching Fallon on the side.  Sorry I was upset, this could have an effect, but I do not agree that you deal with me by saying I'm black.  I'm just upset right now.

It's fact, tho.  I saw on The Price is Right a black lady looked at another white girl like me who's like got it together and didn't give her all this I know your race and I don't like you mess.

There's nothing wrong.

Just their attitude and incompetence.

Issue

I don't wanna sit here and unravel the mess the people experimenting on me did.

Stuff

Big Eyes was so great!

Dr Phil was a bit on edge.

Ellen talked to Oprah and 2 kids from PA.

Edit

I added my blog to my Facebook.

OK, who did it?

My recording has 2 falls.  I think it's a real glitch, but they may have done it.

Was the Ellen before a joke?

If she didn't mean it, it is a joke.  She doesn't mean it now.  Ha ha ha, no offense.

Apology

Sorry I got mad at certain people in a certain way.  Guess I wasn't on exactly the right things to say, but what and how else?  I cloak things for a reason.  I don't wanna be mean really.  I mean something else in a non-sarcastic way.

My Heart Will Go On from Titanic (1997) sung by me

K

off and maybe on singing

At least we'll all know why

about these things.  ;o

Ha ha ha.  I committed the sin.  I joked.  Tell me, will I die on a tree?  And the joke wasn't a real joke!

Why?

Why would someone not like me?  No one does.  I'm a normal person.

I'm not submitting to perverted thought for stimulation.  I don't need it.  I'm not mad.  Is anyone else about what I seemed to try to say?

Like, punishing me in wrong ways.  Mainly telling me I did all these things I didn't do, like there's stuff around me ya'll wanna boss around.

I'm trying to prevent myself from getting mad.  I just wanna be me.

You all don't have to keep talking to me about liking me like an SO.

Edit

I moved the Twitter link up on the left side of the blog.

My Party

I want the world actively against this without any crime being committed.

I just wonder

why this person does all these things and I am not supposed to.  Like Chloe Grace Moretz in Dark Shadows with Tim Burton and Johnny Depp.  Just one thing and she's automatically right.

I do not forgive.

Hey, I'm not attacking anyone.  I'm just talking about something.  Some of it is funny.  Some of it seems controversial to some.

You think you can come back again and be nice to me after being nice to all these teens, different people.  That's forgiveness.  It's not gonna work.  You already made me feel bad.  I don't know what I like, anymore.  I'm confidently independent, sound.  I can't take your pity on this point, anyone.  It's like I never wanna do it.  Never wanna trust in you guys.  As being in a nice relationship with me.  Or something like that.

Edit

I forgot to add Twitter to the sidebar on the left.

What if you're right

but just wrong to successfully punish me?

You want to be wrong but successfully right to punish me.  Aren't you the "hero" doing all this dirty work for everyone like I'm a hostage?

A New Sin

Joking

Against

Anyone on my side?

They pretended someone else had a boy and girl with someone, too.

I wanted to think about it in my own way and they did it more.

I just explained why you were wrong.  Anyone agrees.  Why are you even talking to me?  Burnt out?

You just admitted you were a liar.

No one won the world over me in your fantasy.

Aah, what's up, Doc?

They are making me feel bad about myself by making another girl cancel out my relationship with anyone.  They're telling me I can't let it out on the inside in what I think.  I can't set the scene, paint the picture.  I just suspect something else controversial is to come.  Why not call it off?  Give me the outcasts.  I won't be alone, that's for sure.  I'm either with someone or not.  I do things and live in a legal/scientifically accurate environment that can become closely monitored.

So, the point is I can joke with the facts as long as I don't wish ill on anyone.  I don't know if anything else won't come up later.  I don't joke constantly.

I want to take it back, but something could happen again.  Why don't we call this part of the relationships off?  You're all just discriminating against me racially and telling me I blew it every day.  Do other people or can other people always do what you want or else it's off?  Why sniff up everyone's butt all the time, too?  If you accept me, you accept me.  I'm not here to say I'm in a contest and I blew it.  All these ideas I'm doing something punishable is wrong.  No one responds to this and just says this is how I buy my attention.  Well, it's not, son.

Update

About Me on the left side of my blog

Dr. Phil

I was really impressed.  The parents seemed good.  Their son is overly emotional and disappointed with himself.

The doctor was nice and intellectual.

I need to learn to control my temper.

Even if someone did something to me I wouldn't do to anyone.  I didn't mean anything, but I knew I was being wronged and it seemed to be affecting my life in different ways.  I just don't want to be mean to anyone.  Is that conceited, to you?  Cuz that's what started this whole mess.

The Psychiatrist

Interesting visit.

He wanted to know how I was doing, and I said I wasn't doing anything, like school/work.  They seemed to be into rehab programs.  I wanted to check in there a week.

Lunch

Chick-fil-A

2 sammiches
small fries
large tea
large choc shake

Apology

I went coocoo again and thought of something that could be seen as risque and definitely an insult.  I wish I didn't.  It's so hard to think with these animals.  I thought it was a way of dealing with a thought, but I guess not.  I went and thought something nice in the end and found a problem to weed out, tho, so that wasn't really good news tho.  It was very much not in the spirit of things, and the idea still confuses me and I don't get it other than a false punishment.  Some people care, some might not.  I was envisioning people being tacky and they brought up something they didn't care about for me and I thought of it in a tacky way.  You can judge me how you want, it was mean of me and I was just confused.  You get the picture?  I'm in trouble.  I will try to ignore it and not think of the tacky thing.

A Few Things That Startle and Upset Me

Help me wherever I am so nothing else/worse happens if possible.

1- always putting someone before me just to punish me for cursing about the ticking noises someone put up in my room
2- discriminating against me racially
3- saying I'm nothing cuz I'm fat
4- testing me little by little in ways that startle and upset me so you can reject me in the end rather than talk and go or not putting me in the picture so I don't get on someone's bad side, esp. like someone I will run into again or like someone famous just for kicks
5- doing things to my life to make a mark or getting overly involved like in my circle of relations in a bad way
6- threatening me and saying like whenver I think of my possible future kids I think of pooh or something like that

Bye!

New Video of Me Singing

New Video and Picture of Me

Imgur

Apology

Sorry for when I was stupid and being mean.  I guess there are more than one time, and I guess if you did read "what" was recent you know what I'm talking about.  I should not post risky things in a hurry.  It was not intended in any bad way, and I posted that.  People just tend to take things their way and then when you're sorry about it they like to use it to their advantage.  People are being mean to me, tho, but I'd say it anyway.  Guess people just want to get you in trouble.  I'd say it cuz it's just people looking to hurt you to say something factual but not really insulting.  I'll try to not do it, anyway.  Why?   I dunno, I just don't like hurting people.  I can see myself saying it in different context, like with others.  I don't think anyone's feelings should be hurt, but like I said they probably are using it for self-pity or attention.  Sorry if anyone's feelings are hurt, namely the person who'd guess they were.  I just wanted to explain I didn't mean anything in a hurtful way.

Welcome!

Welcome to my BlogSpot!